Frequently Asked Questions
An attachment style is the way we connect with others in relationships, shaped by early experiences with caregivers. It affects how we give and receive love, communicate our needs, and handle closeness or distance. Every single person on the planet – including you, your partner, friends, family, neighbors, colleagues, all have an attachment style.
These include:
- Anxious Attachment - “The Love Addict”
Constantly seeking reassurance and emotional closeness. - Dismissive Avoidant Attachment - “The Lone Wolf”
Independent and self-reliant, often avoids emotional intimacy. - Fearful Avoidant Attachment - “The Hot & Cold”
Torn between wanting closeness and fearing vulnerability. - Secure Attachment - “The Balanced Soul”
Confident in giving & receiving love, creating healthy & fulfilling relationships.
It is important to understand that your attachment style is not a fixed ‘diagnosis’ – it is a subconscious set of rules you learned in early childhood that shaped the way you feel safe and connected in your relationships. You were not born with your attachment style; therefore, your attachment can absolutely change!
Understanding your attachment style is a profound step toward healing, especially on a spiritual journey like yours, which helps you build more secure, fulfilling relationships, including a deeper, more respectful connection to your Self.
The subconscious mind (SCM) was formed between the ages of 0-2, and is the part of your mind that holds 95% of your beliefs, thoughts, emotions, actions, and decisions. It’s a memorized set of patterns you learned in early childhood that shaped the way you learned to interpret your world and how you feel safe.
The SCM is imprinted through repetition plus emotion, meaning, whatever you were *repeatedly* exposed to in childhood along with a high emotional charge, your SCM took a ‘snapshot’ of that experience (or multiple experiences) and imprinted that into your mind.
The SCM communicates through images and emotions, unlike the conscious mind, which only comprises 3-5% of your mind and speaks through words and language.
In my coaching, we work with your SCM so we can take the “shortcut” to creating profound, lasting, change in thoughts, habits, and relationships!
By learning how to target the SCM (which is felt in the body), we can begin to reprogram the core wounds and unmet needs that shaped your insecure attachment patterns. This process helps you build healthier boundaries, communicate more effectively, and regulate your nervous system and emotions. Over time, you’ll develop new coping mechanisms that support secure, thriving relationships - and thus skyrocket you toward secure attachment!
Feminine energy is not a gender – it’s an energy. Feminine energy is the flow, intuition, and presence that comes from connecting with oneself in the present moment, and is felt in the body. While masculine energy focuses on structure, control, and doing, feminine energy is about creativity, nurturing, and being. It is associated with feelings of empathy, compassion, and creativity.
Everyone has both masculine and feminine energies, and learning to activate feminine energy helps people feel more attuned to their emotions, intuition, and body, bringing a sense of ease, joy, and fulfillment. This might look like experiencing deeper connections, making aligned decisions, and feeling less stress and burnout.
In contrast, being stuck in masculine energy—focused heavily on control, productivity, or perfection—can lead to feeling disconnected from one’s true self, constantly ‘in the head,’ feel greater friction, stress, and exhausted.
Both masculine and feminine energies are necessary and needed, and when they are balanced, one can experience far greater enjoyment in life, authentic & harmonious relationships, and a more fulfilling way of being.
How do you activate your feminine energy? By getting into your BODY (the home of your subconscious mind & inner world)!
Spiritual wellness is about nurturing a deep connection with yourself so you can feel empowered, aligned, and alive. It’s not connected to any specific religion; rather, it’s a non-denominational approach to spirituality that you define for yourself. This journey is about caring for your whole being—mind, body, and spirit—so you can reduce anxiety, hear your inner voice more clearly, and feel truly well.
Spiritual Wellness is about learning how to get into your BODY mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually:
- Mentally: Getting into your body mentally is learning how to hear your inner thoughts, dialogue, and intuition. By cultivating mental clarity, you become more attuned to your own inner guidance and wisdom.
- Emotionally: It’s also about learning to feel and articulate the emotions and sensations in your body, allowing yourself to process your feelings rather than suppressing them. This opens the door to greater emotional health and balance.
- Physically: Keeping your body well is essential to spiritual wellness. This includes getting in tune with physical sensations like energy levels, fatigue, soreness, and hunger, but also paying close attention to gut health. Gut health is directly connected to nervous system regulation and reducing anxiety. When your gut and body are healthy, it’s easier to connect with your inner self, feel grounded, and hear your intuition clearly.
- Spiritually: Spiritually, wellness means connecting with your higher self and aligning with a greater sense of purpose. This connection raises your energetic vibration and enables you to live with more intention, joy, and ease.
While our approach respects all religions, we don’t practice any specific religious sect. Instead, we focus on spirituality as a personal, individual journey. Our practices include tools like astrology and connecting with angels and guides, but your spiritual path can look however you want it to.
Your spiritual connection doesn’t have to follow any set path—it’s unique to you. It might mean spending time in nature, creating art, or even connecting with your pet. Spiritual wellness is about finding what resonates with your soul and supports you in feeling healthy, vibrant, and connected to your deepest self.
The connection between gut health and healing anxious attachment is deeper than one might think and it’s all about nurturing your nervous system! A healthy gut supports a balanced nervous system, which is essential for managing anxiety, feeling calm, and staying grounded.
Your gut is often called your "second brain" because of its intimate connection with your nervous system. When your gut health is compromised, it can throw your entire system out of balance, making it even harder to heal an anxious attachment.
To heal any insecure attachment wound, it's crucial to regulate your nervous system. When your gut is in good shape, it sends positive signals to your brain, promoting a sense of calm & stability.
By cleaning up your nutrition & healing your gut, you’re fast-tracking your body’s ability to heal, paving the way for deeper emotional transformation. This state is crucial for getting into your body and becoming more attuned to what you truly feel and need.
The nervous system is also intricately connected to the subconscious mind. Learning to slow down internally through proper nutrition & gut health can help reprogram your subconscious mind & recondition your attachment style, thus skyrocketing you toward secure attachment!
On a spiritual level, taking care of your gut and eating clean, nourishing foods helps you connect to your intuition and higher self. When your body feels well, it’s easier to hear and trust your inner voice. A healthy gut is foundational for raising your energetic vibration, which strengthens your connection to your intuition and supports a deeper spiritual alignment. In this way, gut health is essential for achieving both physical wellness and spiritual clarity, helping you feel more empowered, grounded, and aligned with your soul’s purpose.
Working with me as a Spiritual Wellness & Feminine Energy Guide is a unique experience that complements traditional therapy, though takes a different approach. While therapy often focuses on unpacking past experiences and memories, especially those from childhood, to heal trauma (using modalities like IFS or EMDR), my work is designed to support your healing in the present, help you reconnect with your inner world, and move toward secure attachment.
Rather than revisiting every past memory, I focus on the stories and limiting beliefs imprinted in your subconscious mind that continue to trigger anxiety and unmet needs, ultimately blocking your connection to your intuition. Together, we identify these limiting beliefs and use techniques like subconscious reprogramming, breathwork, restorative yoga, and gut health practices to shift them. This somatic approach helps you get into your body, regulate your nervous system, and recondition your attachment style so you can feel secure and soul-aligned.
Therapy can be a powerful tool for deeper trauma healing, and my work complements it well! Therapy helps you uncover and process the deeper unconscious material, while I guide you through reconditioning and practical steps to move forward in a secure, empowered way. Working together, we address both the roots and the growth, helping you step into a life that feels aligned with your true Soul Self.
Sessions are held virtually over Zoom.
I work with both women and men in my coaching practice. Men have feminine energy, too, and really benefit from learning how to articulate & regulate their emotions (especially in a world that tells them not to feel). Men in my coaching practice have expressed feeling a significant reduction in lifelong anxiety by learning how to get into their body and reprogramming outdated limiting beliefs.
All in all, this work is great for anyone on a spiritual healing journey who is ready for radical transformation to become securely attached, soul aligned, and to feel sexy, amazing, empowered & alive in their body!
“We are in desperate need of wholehearted leaders
who are self-aware enough to lead from both their
heart and mind rather than unevolved leaders
who lead from hurt and fear.”
~ Dr. Brene Brown
My doctoral research is in Mindfulness for Kindergarteners in Public Education, where I conducted a year-long qualitative case study exploring the possible emergence of prosocial and relational leadership qualities in a mindfulness-based kindergarten classroom.
As a lifelong anxiety sufferer, I often wondered how my life might have been different if I had been taught to breathe as a child. Not that I had a tumultuous childhood, though perhaps this would have given me the language to describe how I was feeling, along with tools to help me regulate. This realization became the “north star” of my research and has guided my journey along the way.
What has become clear as day to me is how being in a dysregulated state affects my ability to lead and be present with others. When I’m in anxious, agitated state, I tend to resort to micromanaging where I’m controlling and irritable. Yet when I'm grounded and centered, I'm relaxed, receptive, I can think clearly, and I’m able to be present with others.
My research suggests that fostering self-regulation practices along with emotional literacy – beginning at the age of 5 – may support developing the capacity for relational leadership qualities of emotional intelligence, social intelligence, and prosocial behavior – all of which are deemed as necessary for leadership of the 21st century, and have been shown to be enacted through a mindfulness practice.
The intersection looks like this: Being in a state of presence and awareness (mindfulness) while interacting with and influencing others (emotional & social intelligence) may promote a higher sense of caring and concern for others (prosocial behavior) and affect the way the group leads (relational leadership).
Imagine if all children learned the vernacular and functionality of identifying, labeling, and feeling their emotions and were given tools to self-regulate.
This may lead into becoming adults who are equip to mindfully manage their emotions, who can be in relationship with others where they’re not leading from a place of hurt and fear.
Of course, mindfulness is not the universal panacea and will not resolve all the complex problems within the world. I am not suggesting relational leadership is the one and only way to lead or would work in all contexts - it won’t - but what it could do is promote awareness for how we influence others by being mindfully aware about how we act, talk, speak, involve, and affect others.
My hope is that eventually all public-school classrooms would incorporate some form of age-appropriate mindfulness practice to support an emotionally healthier population of future leaders who value prosociality and relational capacity.
It has been an honor and a privilege to contribute my energy, passion, insight, fervor, and zest into this amazing field of early childhood relational leadership development and to advocate for the advancement of research for mindfulness as a potential strategy for enacting emotional/social intelligence and prosociality in the kindergarten population.
If what Robert Fulgham says is true that “all I ever need to know I learned in kindergarten,” perhaps this phrase will go on to include learning to become mindful and emotionally intelligent children, who learn to become mindful, emotionally intelligent adults, and thus, mindful, emotionally intelligent leaders with strong prosocial and relational capacity.